This past summer there was a sleeper-hit movie that had women adoring the main character and men flocking in secret to partake in it’s raunchiness, hoping that their wifeys wouldn’t go all Kelly Preston and rethink just what kind of man they’ve gotten themselves involved with. That movie was called Magic Mike. Keeping things bubbling on the low, there was another low-key movie that no one was checking for, but blew up and became the talk of the town.
Comic genius – to me anyway – Seth McFarlane (Dude created Family Guy, co-created the superior American Dad and the not so superior but constantly improving, The Cleveland Show) made his Hollywood film directorial debut with Ted, a movie about a stuffed bear that comes to life when a boy wishes on a star like The Cover Girls did in the ‘90s. While on the surface it may seem like the second coming of a Pinocchio, Ted became the highest grossing R-rated movie of all-time for a reason, when it cleared $469 million and left The Hangover in it’s rearview mirror.
With a drug addicted teddy bear, defecating prostitutes and old-ass Mark Wahlberg (lol the character was like 30) dating young and hot Mila Kunis – this has uncivilized written all over it. But even with all the vulgar language, drug use and violence, Ted was all heart. John (Marky Mark) has been feeling those good vibrations with Lori (Kunis) for a few years, but has been a constant disappointment to her due to his childish relationship with Ted (voice by Seth McFarlane.) Though “bros before hoes” is the quote usually used in these kind of situations, John realizes that if he truly wants to reach that next level of love and understanding with Lori, then he has to abide by that ol’ Corinthians 13:11 quote.
But it isn’t going to be easy for John to convince Lori that he’s that dude for her with a toy stalker, would-be-home-wrecker, and Flash Gordon himself interfering in the relationship one way or another.
Ted is undoubtedly the kind of stoner movie that’ll live on for decades like a Friday or a Cheech and Chong joint (no pun intended). Fraternities will have pledges get hammered while watching this movie, and burnouts will watch this over and over while getting twisted like Kut Klose had Keith Sweat, simply because the cable got cut and this is the only DVD they’ll have in the house (we all have that homie in our cypher.)
To witness it, is to realize why Ted is the chosen one of 2012 when it comes to comedy movies. It makes you laugh, feel and apparently turn you on according to the “Plushies” community. Whichever way you cut it, Ted is definitely a flick you’d want to own in your video library. Even if you don’t appreciate the movie on a comedic level, you can always cut it on and just stare at Mila Kunis’ incredibly tantalizing eyes, cross your fingers, and hope she comes out your TV like The Ring.
Rated R / Unrated
Time: 106 Minutes
• Digital Copy of Ted
• Ultra Violet
• Deleted Scenes
• Alternate Takes
• Gag Reel
• Ted: The Making Of
• Teddy Bear Scuffle
• Feature Commentary with Director/Co-Writer Seth MacFarlane, Co-Writer Alec Sulkin and Star Mark Wahlberg (Theatrical Version Only)
• My Scenes
• pocket BLU App