The Chicago Bears Week 3 win over the New York Jets doesn't look that impressive anymore as the watershed Jay Cutler season never came to pass. Instead, the Cutler jokes have continued writing themselves. But we won't pounce on those today.
It seems like simple enough advice, but it’s a common saying that applies to the consensus opinion on Cutler. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.
Perhaps, the same thing goes for Chicago’s sports media, which doesn’t have anything to ask of Cutler, and may explain why they didn’t show up to his postgame presser on Monday Night. Presumably, they were searching for offensive coordinator Aaron Kromer.
While Andrew Luck’s freakishly positive disposition after negative plays confounds snarling defenders, Cutler’s surly demeanor makes it difficult for Chicago to defend Cutler’s slump.
The best thing you can say about Cutler is that having him is better than having no quarterback. I mean that literally. Sure you’d save $126 million, but the center launching the ball into an empty backfield on first down would not be ideal.
The runner-up for best compliment comes via the NFL Network’s Ian Rapoport discussing how much more professional Cutler seemed after Kromer’s admission that he was the locker room snitch responsible for the “buyer’s remorse” polemic that lambasted Cutler and Rapoport’s ensuing observation about his improved emotional control —in press conferences.
Recently, someone tried to put me onto The Dog Whisperer for tips on how to deal with my dog non-verbally. It reminded me of the Bears Cutler dynamic and of the tale of how Cutler used to tune out John Elway and veteran John Lynch when they would attempt to impart knowledge about pass coverages and the nature of the business upon him.
Marc Trestman was hired to be Cutler’s Cesar Milan. Trestman’s attempts to train Cutler to stop pissing all over the offensive game plan and to clean up his turd performances has been exasperating.
Against New Orleans on Monday Night, Cutler lifted his leg and stank it up.
Martellus Bennett was imported from Dalllas and has settled into his role as a redzone touchdown machine and a dependable target behind Alshon Jeffery and Brandon Marshall.
However, he seems to have joined the chorus of Cutler detractors.
‘‘There are some positions on the team that need to step up with leadership and things like that around the club,” Bennett told the Chicago Sun-Times. “But overall, I just feel like we need passion to come from certain places. I don’t think the passion is always there all the time. But overall, it just hasn’t been there.’’
Even Marshall is playing devil’s advocate on the side of Cutler’s ardent detractors.
Much like Mike Vick in Philly or Carson Palmer in Arizona, the Bears investment in Cutler is bound to crash like Cam Newton’s Dodge pickup.
At 31 years old, he’s going to begin aging in dog years soon.
Cutler is never implicitly mentioned, but it’s not hard to tell who he’s referring to.
Passing Blake Bortles on any list—unless it’s for most attractive significant other is never a good thing. And that’s exactly what Cutler did on Monday night.
Cutler’s 18th interception of the year pushed him past Bortles for the NFL lead.
To call this a downward spiral is a misnomer. It implies there was a recent peak from which to descend.
Cutler should probably begin taking a bit of this columns’ aforementioned advice.
If you don’t see a receiver’s who’s open, you probably shouldn’t throw it at all.
Meanwhile, the Bears are stuck in a quagmire. They made a completely asinine decision to award Cutler with an exorbitant contract in the hopes that Trestman would train him to hone his skills and slay the league. Instead, is end-of-year performance review reads the exact same as it has for the past nine seasons.
It'll depict a naturally talented signal caller who lacks the attention to detail, football IQ and leadership skills necessary to become the cornerstone of a winning franchise.
He also may be in possession of the most onerous contract in all of sports. Amazingly, the Bears had the option to slap a franchise tag on Cutler, but thy chose the most financially irresponsible option available and suddenly realize their credit cards are maxed out for the foreseeable future.
The extension Kobe Bryant signed with Los Angeles last year comes to mind as equally burdensome, but their Hall of Fame guard won five titles when the talent around him was adequate.
Andy Dalton’s $115 million contract is all bonuses and easy to wiggle out of.
Even baseball’s Bad Contract King Alex Rodriguez, due $63 million between 2015 and 2017 has to congratulate Cutler for his ratio of value-to-production. MLB doesn’t operate with a salary cap that can put teams in an economic bind.
The Bears are essentially on the hook for two more seasons. Cutler’s $22.5 million this season is the league's highest and if they wanted to cut him, the Bears would be forced to pay him $15 million -- "straight cash homie." It would cost $10 million to cut him between the 2015 and 2016 seasons as well.
There’s one compliment about Cutler that everyone can agree with. He’s got great representation.