The Boston Red Sox saw off the Tampa Bay Rays at Fenway Park 3-1 to advance to the ALCS.

 

Police were called to Matt Schaub's house in Houston after his latest pick-six because fans were outside harassing him. Get a freaking life. These are probably the same parents who banned balls from recess to prevent their kids from such pain.

 

Gene Stallings is the latest former football player to express his concern that people who don't know as much about football as him, shouldn't be on the NCAA playoff selection committee. Stallings joins a chorus of idiots led by David Pollack who thinks NCAA rankings are rocket science. 

 

Kobe Bryant's surgery went well in Germany and he's expected back in LA soon.

 

Perhaps Roddy White and Julio Jones should hit up Europe for surgery. After finding out Julio may be done for the year (possibly because he broke a screw in his surgically repaired foot), The Falcons said White is only 50-50 for the weekend.

 

Jadeveon Clowney might want to hit it up, too.

 

Remember Mark Sanchez? Apparently he's now actually done for the year after getting surgery.

 

Houston Texans TE Owen Daniels will miss 4-6 weeks with a fracture in his fibula.

 

DeSean Jackson says Darrelle Revis can't run with him. 

 

Do you believe? Adam Pacman Jones was found not guilty of assault.

 

 

FLASHING LIGHTS

 

ScHoolboy Q reveals that TDE tried to sign Danny Brown.

 

Kanye West will appear on Jimmy Kimmel today to iron out their differences. 

 

Questlove has another book coming out called Soul Train: The Music, Dance and Style of a Generation.

 

Justin Timberlake went No. 1 for the second time in 2013. 

 

Lauryn Hill thanked her fans for support in an open letter.

 

Eminem drops a video for "Survival."

 

 

DID YOU REALIZE?

 

What do you joke about at a dinner party with Dick Cheney? Torture, obviously. 

 

The Supreme Court will hear arguments for and against campaign finance laws that currently allow rich people to do whatever the hell they want. Apparently it might be a tough case.

 

The G.O.P. aka the "fiscally responsible party" says defaulting on our debt "wouldn't be that bad." I actually don't have a joke for that one, it's just depressing. 

 

Here's what the NSA does with our information.

 

GOTTA HAVE IT

 

Dom Kennedy and Nipsey Hussle are back at it again, this time with "Pleez."